Wednesday, January 27, 2010

When the Telephone Rings

Two minutes ago, a ringing phone snapped me back to reality and I am just about ready to stand on my desk and boogy! It was a nurse from my lovely doc's office. My CA125 is normal. 'Normal...' I haven't been called that in a while. She actually called me 'normal' and for now I am relishing in that fact.

I am not even going to think about my next round of tests right now. Afterall, it is not unusual to be called back for a repeat mammogram and ultrasound, right? I am just not looking forward to having an audience. Apparently the radiologist is going to be in the room this time along with the technician. One would think I have lost all my modesty after what I have been through over the past while. Sigh. I guess will have once it's all over!
Right now I'm off to dance with my grandbabies in the kitchen! Tap..tap...clickety-click. Like my new tap shoes?

Thank You Jesus!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Say Cheese

A little cheesy or maybe even a tad corny, but that's a command that still incites bared teeth and toothy grins in front of a camera.

I always used to hate having my photo taken but I think I am over that now, although I don't make it a habit posing in front of a camera if I can help it.

I'm thinking that my hesitancy about having my mug shot on photo paper had to do with my teeth. I always thought I had rabbit teeth. Maybe it was something to do with my family calling me bugs bunny when I was a young whipper snapper. Not nice, huh? But in my maturity I am over it. (I think)

Last year I was awarded top prize for individual fundraiser at the Ovarian Cancer Canada Winners Walk of Hope and my prize was a super 2 hour package from a photography studio in Barrie - 3 Girls and a Camera.

It was time to get a grip and show my grin! We needed updated photos for the Rogue's Gallery at our house!

We had some troubles setting up a time that was convenient for everyone to get together for family pics but we eventually made it. We headed north in our blue jeans and pink for girls; black for boys ensemble.

Laura Baker, the photographer extraordinaire, nestled us nicely into her old barn and we primped and posed every which way on the straw bales. It was lots of fun and Laura must have snapped 200 pictures or more! She was so kind and patient with us - even though it was a 'prize' and not a paid sitting for her. What a gem.

Now that I have the CD filled with all my grinning offspring and their gorgeous families (am I slightly prejudiced?) I am trying to figure out sizes for the wall and where to hang them. I don't exactly have a discerning eye for interior decorating, I am going to give it the old college try, though. Hmmm. Should be fun!
The End(s)

Thursday, January 21, 2010

One Lump or Two, Madam? Subtitle: Defining Normal

(This post was originally written on Tuesday, January 19/10)

The verdict is [partially] in and so far the news is good. The two odd lumpy areas at the base of my spine were once again, lipomas, which are basically clinically insignificant. For that, I breath a sigh of relief!

The abdominal x-ray shows a few issues - naught that a few pills can't help, though. I still have to sit tight for the repeat mammogram on the lump but it may be just a bad pose on my part and yet one more insignificant lump to add to my collection. We'll see.

Tomorrow - bloodwork. Then we will close this Pandora's box and hopefully life will plateau once more. I hesitate to say it will get back to 'normal' for I have forgotten what that is to be honest. Was I ever there?

I'm sitting in the cardiac unit at University Hospital in London writing this as I await the completion of Dad's pacemaker procedure - he's getting a "newer model." I wonder if Dad ever wanted to be 'normal' again and not have a pacemaker. But since he has had one since 1983, I guess having one is normal for him. I suppose, then, that normal is relative.

Anyway, when I stop and think about it, normal would probably be far too boring for this gal who can't sit still at the best of times. We journey on and count it all joy. That's my kind of normal!

Monday, January 11, 2010

Neurotic? Psychotic? Idiotic?

So I went to the doctor's armed with my lovely new agenda. The list seemed silly but Shirley, the nurse, encouraged me by telling me that it was a smart thing to do, for patients have the tendency to forget things once the doctor walks in.

"You don't think I am neurotic doing this?" I asked.

"Of course not. It's your life and your body. You have every right to say what's up and to write it down."

We chatted some more. Shirley gave me the confidence to express exactly what was on my mind and to request my CA125 blood test although my oncologist told me it would just be a source of anxiety if it was elevated. In other words, they wouldn't do repeat chemotherapy until I got sicker.

It was a bit of an extended visit with my lovely MD and she seemed sincere in her concerns and allowed me to share and read from my 'neurotic list.' In a nutshell, she ended up ordering two ultrasounds, one x-ray, one mammogram and bloodwork.

So I went on my merry way and wrote the dates down for all my appointments. All of a sudden I felt like it was 2008 again when health related appointments were the order of the day, the week, the month, the year!

With students rebooked and dates juggled, I ended up being able to have all the tests in one day, except for the bloodwork. I had an ultrasound and a mammogram in one hospital and a mammogram and a second ultrasound in another hospital. Bloodwork will happen next Wednesday [I have to remember not to eat anything in the morning!]

I am now waiting for the results of the ultrasound and the x-ray. These were done because of the lump on the base of my spine and also as a followup from the unexplained 'spell' that I had before Christmas. I am thinking that no news is good news, because it has been three days and no one has called.

The mammogram is another story. I am trying not to think bad thoughts but the news did come in and now I have to go back to get 'rechecked.' The nurse who called me on the day following the initial mammogram said the doctor who read it 'just wasn't sure.' They wanted to check a suspicious area. So here's the kicker. The nurse scored me another appointment but it isn't for another three and a half weeks. To me, that sounds like it's naught to fret about, right?

Thinking positively. Giving it to God. Taking it back again to chew and worry over. Thinking positively again. Apologizing and giving it back to God. Sigh...

Being a profoundly lumpy person, I am trying to get my head around this and am trying to convince myself that these are 'just another couple of harmless lumps."

Enough said...I have had my little panic attack so now I will wait. I mean, why waste my time thinking the worst when I could be enjoying the best! One day at a time, sweet Jesus!