Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Eight is Great!

So last Wednesday I tread with trepidation once again, into the cancer clinic. I had been shifted from a check-up every six months back to every three months because of a few suspect problems. I wasn't really worried because deep down in the recesses of my soul, I know God has everything under control. Admittedly I am notorious for snatching things back and then fear rears it's ugly head. But this time I really tried to trust, to rest in Him, to count blessings and to smile.

The oncologist and I had a good chat and after a thorough check up, we discussed a few more things and then he filled out a requisition for bloodwork and sent me on my merry way. The lab, tucked in the corner of the cancer clinic, beckoned me and as I crossed the threshold, the memories surfaced. I took a number and a seat. Then I stupidly wondered where the candy dish was.  Each time I had had my blood work done prior to chemo, the kindly volunteer had always offered me a sweet treat. But there was no candy. There was no yellow-clad volunteer, either.

Within a few moments a young gal called me in and I climbed into the big leather recliner and assumed the position. As the blood gurgled slowly into the tube, I prayed. I always pray that God's will be done, but I also always hope that my will matches His!

And the good news did today.  I called back to the cancer clinic - just as my primary care nurse had told me.  Normal readings for a CA 125 are between 0 & 35 U/ml. My winning number today was 8! It beats the 1500+ that it was prior to chemo!

 So now, I do my best to not think about what might have been and try to focus on what's in store tomorrow.  I will get up, inhale, give thanks for that breath, smile and then tackle the day. Bring it on.  Life is good one day at a time!

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Ovarian Cancer Canada Kitchener Mini Walk of Hope

It's here. Amanda and I have been rushed off our feet and busy as those proverbial buzzing critters for the past while, but the Walk of Hope is ready to roll and is scheduled for take-off tomorrow morning at Victoria Park Kitchener. For some kooky reason I am feeling a tad emotional right now as I contemplate what we are doing. A few minutes ago I looked back in my journal to see what I  was doing on September 11th, 2008. 

                            "This was my fifth chemo-day. It was long and I was tired..." my journal entry begins.

Yes, that stinkin' bittersweet poison that dripped away choking out the cancer cells. Hard to forget those times.  Chemo took its toll. I still have tell-tale effects that I don't think will ever go away - tingling in my toes and feet; memory pauses (that's a nice way of saying stupidly forgetful); sleeplessness and other niggling things. But I made it through thus far and I am jolly-well grateful and am enjoying survivor-status. I can handle and truly live with those  leftover reminders, when I think about what might have been.

God didn't quite have my heavenly room ready, I guess and I am thinking He had some other plans for this noisy girl. Hopefully I am on the right track.

Doing my part to help spread the word and raise awareness about the signs and symptoms of ovarian cancer seems to be a bit of a passion - one of the reasons for my involvement in this Walk of Hope tomorrow. Maybe I am supposed to be a mouthpiece - not exactly one of my weaknesses.

As I hit the pillow tonight, I am praying for sunshine tomorrow, for a great crowd, for an injury free walk, for sisters everywhere who are dealing with ovarian cancer to realize they are not alone and for this event to leave a sweet taste in the mouth of participants and volunteers alike. An extra prayer tossed in for the tent not collapsing or me not forgetting what I am supposed to say, for some divine appointments and for anyone battling the disease to feel HOPE.

Yours Truly September 2008 at the Barrie Walk of Hope; we've come a long way baby!
(I think I am wearing the same shoes tomorrow at the Kitchener Walk. Yikes! I need to go shopping.) 
Thanks everyone for your support.