Thoughts From the Waiting Room

(Yesterday's Journal Entry- Tuesday, October 22nd, 2013)

 
     POW! BIFF! WHAM!  That's the sound of me kicking and screaming as I head out this morning on that all too familiar journey.

Destination: Walkerton Hospital.
Purpose: CAT scan.
   
     Thursday's visit to the cancer clinic in London ended with a visit to the lab for blood work and plans for a CAT scan appointment. An area in my right abdomen is a bit of a concern so my oncologist is investigating.

Last time I visited the Walkerton Hospital was 2008. 'Twas then the diagnosis of ovarian cancer was confirmed. Not letting my head go there again. I suppose the irony behind all this is that October 2013 marks my five year jumping off point in the cancer world.

     Recently I spoke to a group of very welcoming women at a local church on the topic of hope. I prayed that God would bless me with words that day that would encourage anyone experiencing that spiralling out of control feeling. God never said in His word that when we signed on as believers there would be smooth sailing. What He did promise was that He would be with us always and that by fully trusting in Him we would find strength. In Christ there is hope...

     So, it's time to practise what I preach. I've just tossed back two huge Styrofoam vases filled with the 'special' pre CAT scan liquid and await being engulfed by the great technological monster, complete with smiley faces which light up showing me when to hold my breath and when to breathe. I don't want my joy to be stolen so I remember what I said about hope. I smile and feel strengthened.

     As I look around the waiting room I see a soul in agony. The IV port peeks under her jacket and her grimace indicates that pain is monopolizing her peace. A woman about my age looking so much more worse off than I feel. I am grateful that she gets called in before me. I look fine. She doesn't. She needs to be tended to first.

     A handsome young man in a black and white Roots jacket looks preoccupied - head resting against the bleak, beige wall. Concerned about a loved one, perhaps? A wife? A mother? A child?

     Everyone has a story. Sometimes we feel alone as our tale unfolds. But today - although I am alone in the waiting room, I am far from feeling alone on my journey. God has covered me with the balm of Holy Spirit; the love of Christ and His reassurance. 

     "Be strong and of good courage," He whispers. "Do not fear nor be afraid...for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you." I cherish His promises.

     The technician comes to collect her next customer.

  

Sick of Me

     Mrs. B Has Cancer - my children's fiction chapter book - is out. Woohoo! I'm rocking pleased about that and am so thrilled with the response. I got the books from my printer a little while back and sold 50 of them in a matter of two, maybe three days. Facebook can be a beautiful thing! I have some of the nicest friends. I've also been invited to speak about my book, my life as a cancer survivor and a writer. People are actually interested in what I have to say - who knew?

 Pretty soon the official release for my book will take place and then hopefully the sales graph will continue to head in the right direction. I am happy for that and I am thrilled that there are children and others who are buying and actually reading my book. That rates high on my 'like meter.'

     But one thing I cannot 100% get my head around yet is the
emotional part of marketing. I actually don't mind the process of marketing really and finding ways to get the word out about my new book. I have lots of great ideas - some maybe a little far-fetched. But for some strange reason every time I go into an establishment to promote my book, send a note to a newspaper for a press release, or drop in at local schools, I always do so with a measure of guilt. Perhaps guilt isn't the best way to describe it, but I will say I really don't like not being humble about what I do - marketing is so not about being humble.

   Even now when I start talking about me being humble I feel like I am not being very humble when I do that. I guess I wonder if people get sick of me and hearing about my accomplishments, my writing, my books. But every conference I attend, every book I read on promotion, every experienced writer I speak to will say the same - 'you've got to get yourself out there' if you want to sell your books and get branded.

     I keep wondering what God wants me to do. I keep reminding myself to be patient because all good things come to those who wait. I keep thinking that if God wanted me to sell books or get speaking/writing gigs then He would make the divine appointments and arrangements...wouldn't He?

     I guess marketing for me is a bit of a love/hate relationship. I've been plugging my latest book for a while now and so far I am yet to be rejected. No one yet has looked me square in the eye and said, "No' I am not in the least bit interested in reading your story!" Maybe I fear rejection the most.

     Being a writer can be a bit of a lonely profession but luckily I am cut out for that and really do enjoy long hours slogging it out with words and heart stuff that causes me to bleed onto paper. Over this next while I hope to take my writing career to a new level [talk less and do more] but the scary part of that is that it involves more than writing.

     Maybe if my book sales are through the roof then I can hire myself a full time publicity/marketing manager and then I can get back to doing what I do/like best. One can dream.

     P.S. Here are the details of the up and coming book release: (disclaimer: if you really are getting sick of me and my shameless promotions - press DELETE!)

                                                         Join Author -

                                             Glynis M. Belec

at the
Studio FactoR 

for a 

PARTY!

                                           

24 Wood Street, Drayton

            

Pick up your signed copy of 

Mrs. B Has Cancer 

FREE GAMES AND ACTIVITIES:

Fish pond, Guessing Games, Dart Game, Photo Booth and more. Prizes,

Draw Prize, Refreshments…Mmmm

*$1.00 from the sale of each book goes to Ovarian Cancer Canada