On Being Thankful - A Perspective about Attitude

I wish I was wiser.Why can't I get published more?
How is it that other people get 1000s of hits on their blog and I only get hundreds?
If someone asks me a biblical question and I cannot answer it, I feel less of a Christian.
We don't have our sod in yet and we have lived in our new house for over a year now.
I am too fat.
I am too wrinkly.
I am too tall if I wear high heels.
I am directionally challenged and get lost too often.
I forget all the time. The chemotherapy fried my brain.
My book isn't finished.
I have to look after my Dad every day.
I wish I could draw or paint
It's too cold.
It's too hot.
My feet hurt
I have to pay the dispensing fee on my medication
I don't know what to make for supper
My husband snores
Some people gossip at church
I've nothing to be thankful for today. Everything went wrong.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

GIVE THANKS

WITH A GRATEFUL HEART
GIVE THANKS
TO THE HOLY ONE
GIVE THANKS
FOR HE'S GIVEN
JESUS CHRIST, HIS SON

AND NOW LET THE WEAK SAY I AM STRONG

LET THE POOR SAY
I AM RICH
BECAUSE OF WHAT
THE LORD HAS DONE
FOR US
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wish I was wiser.

My students love me and think I am pretty smart. Kyle asked me yesterday if I know the meaning of every word in the dictionary when we were discussing vocabulary. He made me smile.

Why can't I get published more?

God has me just where he wants me in my writing career. I am thankful that I write a regular column, that I recently won a couple of prizes in a writing contest and that my writer's group value my teaching and some of them are making contacts and getting published. I also like it when I can grasp snippets of time in my busy day to write.

How is it that other people get 1000s of hits on their blog and I only get hundreds?

Thank goodness people are reading my blog. If I were to line up 100 people that would be a lot of people who are being reached by my words. What if I encourage even one? What if one person draws closer to God because of something I wrote? What if one woman was saved from later stage cancer because she read something on my blog about detecting ovarian cancer early?

If someone asks me a biblical question and I cannot answer it, I feel less of a Christian.

I have quite a few different Bibles. If I need to look something up, I can use any one of these translations or I can use my laptop computer to search for answers. Most of all I can pray without fear of persecution and ask God to reveal things to me.

We don't have our sod in yet and we have lived in our new house for over a year now.

We finally own our own home. It has a been a bit of a journey but my happy hubby did a lot of the work. We have been trying to spend wisely and divvy our paycheques. We always have a roof over our head and we work on the finishing touches when we have the time and the money. I think the sod will be in before the snow flies!

I am too fat.

I sure don't get cold too often! :) My grandchildren love to snuggle. My reflection is only surface. I love my stairs - they are a great place to get extra exercise.

I am too wrinkly.

Miss J. said that when I laugh I get lines on my face. I love my laugh lines. Laughter is the perfect cover for wrinkles.

I am too tall if I wear high heels.

Grace and finesse were never for me. If I wore high heels, I would likely end up having to wear support stockings - not a pretty sight.

I am directionally challenged and get lost too often.

Only Onstar and Google Maps know how often I get lost. They are not about to tell.

I forget all the time. The chemotherapy fried my brain.

But the chemotherapy also fried the cancer cells. Another good check-up again this past month. So far, so good. One day at a time sweet Jesus.

My book isn't finished.

My book is at least underway and I received some positive reviews from an editor I met at a writer's conference.

I have to look after my Dad every day.

My 85 year old Dad has all his marbles, is still able to live alone, trusts me with his affairs and still calls me Dinny (my childhood nickname)

I wish I could draw or paint

I can write and teach.

It's too cold.

I have a full wardrobe and I live in a warm house.

It's too hot.

I have an oscillating fan by my bed with a remote control. We have air conditioning in our new house. We live in Canada. Soon the snow will cool me down.

My feet hurt

I don't need a wheelchair or a walker. If I have pain, I have medication that is paid for through a drug plan from my hubby's work.

I have to pay the dispensing fee on my medication

I read about the man who has a terminal disease and he has to pay for his own medication - $3000 a month.

I don't know what to make for supper

I have a choice. I have food in my freezer, produce in my garden and I cannot recall the last time I ever had to go hungry because the cupboard was bare.

My husband snores

I have a man who loves me despite all my foibles; who has stuck around for 34 years as of next February and who brings me a cup of tea in bed then kisses me good morning (every morning.)

Some people gossip at church

Our church is a loving caring safe place and when I was first diagnosed with cancer I had over 100 cards decorating my wall. People visited regularly and I had meals for weeks and then some. Some of the ladies organized a team and looked after my garden and flower beds all summer long. My congregation prayed without ceasing for our family.

I've nothing to be thankful for today. Everything went wrong.

The brilliant sun shone down on me as I was outside gathering the last of my fresh tomatoes off the vine. One of my students thanked me implicitly for the help I gave her on her project and with her math this afternoon. My granddaughter said she wanted to stay at my house today instead of going home. My sister said she appreciates me. I am sitting here looking at photographs of my family who are all coming for dinner on Thanksgiving Day. I am so excited. Jesus love me this I know (for the Bible tells me so!)

"...be filled with the Spirit, ¹⁹ speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, ²⁰ always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." Ephesians 5:18b- 20

Dancing like No One is Taking Pictures

I have in my hot little hand right now a report thusly entitled - "Department of Nuclear Medicine." Gilles and I are breathing a double sigh of relief as we read the line at the bottom of the page - "There is no evidence to suggest bone metastases." Joy!

The report does, however, indicate degenerative changes and arthritis, likely connected to the chemo, from what I can read. That would account for the pain I feel in my shoulder and feet. I'll talk that over with my oncologist next Thursday at the cancer clinic. Meanwhile I'll do my happy dance - a little laboured and not very attractive - but it is a happy one! Thanks for all your prayers. They keep my head above water! xxx

"A cheerful look brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones..." Proverbs 15:31

(Now there's a great scripture for a 'good news' bone scan report!) x

Can't wait.

I'm going to try and make this post a little longer than my last one. :)

I did start out with good intentions yesterday morning and then lo and behold I ended up having another not so good day. Hence, the mere 'good morning.'

I have been having some tricky issues with my feet. Since this last round of chemo I have had nasty pain and tingling plus some other issues were causing me grief and making me pop the pills which, in turn made me drowsy. The sniffles are gone today, but they had me sit up and order in some Halls, though. It all added up to a bit of a tough day.

But all seems a little calmer this morning, athough Gilles and I both got up at 4:30am. By 5:15 we were downing our oatmeal and brown sugar (which I had forgotten had cinnamon in it - sorry hon') Oh well, rising before the dog and the local roosters makes for a gloriously long day. And didn't I say I was feeling better? That means I can get lots done, right? Or so I thought.

I did a few things awhile ago and just as Gilles was leaving at 7:45, I had to lie down. I felt like I had performed an entire week's housework.

I guess that is my body telling me to take it easy; to do things in measured amounts and to stop trying to rise and conquer everything before 9am. I hate it when I'm not right.

Well, I am actually motivated to do a lot today because the big weekend has arrived. I have to pack. We are heading to the sunny south for a few days. It's a bit of a flying visit - we are spending two days at my friend, Frannie's and then we are heading back home via Nashville. I am pumped (yes I still have steroids in my system) to soak up some Florida rays - at the discretion of my sunscreen, of course.

Now I am in a little bit of a quandary. Since my steroids I have gained a little pudge so of course not much fits well anymore. I avoid the mirror at all costs. So I am opting for the cool, loose dress look - do they still make moo-moos (how do you spell that?) Sigh. I guess this isn't about looking good on the sand. I won't mind if some think I am a colourful beached whale. At least I will be sporting a thankful grin.

I am so looking forward to being with Gilles. He has been so good to me and deserves a change of scenery and routine. We are both looking forward to spending time with Fran and Rick. They have been such a long distance blessing to us.

But I know the part Gilles is really looking forward to is when we hit Nashville, Tennessee! Yeehaa! Bring on those rhinestones and chaps, boy's. Ya'll are gonna' be hearin' some stories in a week or so!


God is so good and I am so thankful. I'm thinking I might stay away from the ridin' the buckin' bronco machine, though.

Count Your Blessings, Name Them One by One

(Photo: Head Gardening Angel - Irene)



I talked to Brenda (nurse) at the clinic today about my ultrasound report. It seems the news about my recent ultrasound is inconclusive, although I was told it may be just a small cyst on my wrist (now there's a sweet little rhyming couplet...) So I guess I will have to wait and see what the oncologist says next week. I'm not too worried about it - besides worrying is a sin and I'm trying to cut down on those if I can!

I was absolutely pampered today. First of all, Kate my nice nurse came and she tried to 'make it all better.' She is really nice but we really have to stop getting into such interesting conversations. :) She ended up staying for almost 2 hours. And my blood pressure was behaving and everything. She did say she was going to order me some horrible (my word) stretchy support stockings for when my legs swell. Sigh...I never thought I would see the day. Oh well, I keep telling myself, this is all temporary.

Then, at noon, Yvonne brought lunch and we chatted for ages. We have absolutely no trouble finding something to say to one another. She is such a good friend and knows how to make me smile. Oh, and did I mention she also brought muffins and cookies and a casserole for supper. I don't deserve all this pampering.

This is the first week that I have not had my garden angels on duty. They were ready to fly in at Irene's (head gardening angel's) command and whisk any weed or garden culprit away. But I wanted to have a go myself this week. So I told Irene I would be okay. I am wondering though, about what God thought of my refusing this week's offer. Twice I attempted to head outside and play in the soil. Twice it started to rain. Eventually I gave up and came inside to write instead. Hmmmm. We'll see what happens tomorrow. I might need to make a call!

I actually wrote a little more in my children's chapter book today - Mrs. B Has Cancer. I am shooting for around 7 or 8,000 words and I am about half way so far. Writing this creative non-fiction book is good therapy for me. It'll be even better therapy if a publisher picks it up! We'll see.

Well, I'm rambling so I think I will sign off now with 5 things that made me thankful, today:

1) Rosemary called (big sister) and told me to stop being so daft and to take all the drugs that are offered and sleep all day if necessary. She yells at me because she loves me.

2) Dad found the 'missing poem' of Mom's. It was quite by accident he found, it too...or was it an accident? I cried when he read it to me over the phone.

3) I figured out how to download (upload?) photos onto Facebook.

4) Gilles is almost finished making my hatrack.

5) We got our "Sunflower Seeds" tee-shirts and my hat in the mail for the Ovarian Cancer Walk for Hope.

6) I have lots of friends in The Word Guild and Inscribe Christian Writers Fellowship who love me. Some I have never met, but they still love me and tell me so often.